3.09.2010

Its Me, Ali Z!

Hi Kitties and Pups:

We seem to have a good bit of mail this week, so we'll need to get at it, won't we?

Lets start with a letter from  a new poster.  Mayzie. Mayzie says her Kitteh sister Abby  won't have anything to do with her.  When Abby sees Mayzie, she just hightails it out of the room.  Mayzie says she tries to let her know she wants to be her friend by staring at her and wagging her tail, but its not doing any good.  What is she doing wrong?.   Alright, Mayzie, this is a pretty easy one.  You dogs know that if you stare at another dog, you may well get into a fight, staring is an act of agression.  So Abby thinks you might want to hurt her. My advice would be to ignore Abby everytime you see her.  Most cats hate being ignored, and she might come around you then.  Just be quiet, no staring or tailwagging.  If she does come around, continue to ignore her and be quiet.  I bet soon you can start to be friends, but don't be impatient about it!

Martha and Bailey wrote with almost the same question as above.  If you bassets do the same thing as Mayzie, you might well make friends with this cat.  Ignore her, and be very quiet around her for a long period of time.  It takes patience to befriend a cat, if you are a dog.  On the other hand, perhaps this cat has had a bad dog experience and will NEVER become your friend.  Have your Mum get you a kitty of your own.

Our friend Tank has written that he is tired of getting yelled at for partaking delicacies he finds on his walks. He says he hardly gets fed enough kibble to stay alive and he tries to supplement with nature's bounty.  He says his parents go ballistic, yelling drop it, drop it!  He found a dead mouse to eat and a crunchy unidentifiable something he liked, and he stresses this is not poo he is speaking of.   Tank, this worries me that you are not getting enough to eat, but you should never eat dead animals you find on walks.  First of all you don't know if they were poisoned or not and if so, you could get very, very sick.  What you need to do is call the Starving Dog hotline, 1-800-FeedMeNow, and report your parents.  Some representative should visit you soon with Kibble and treats.  Good luck, Tank, this is just one of those heartbreaking stories and you may wind up with your parents in court, but this is your life we are speaking of!

Steve,Kat and Wilbur say Wilbur doesn't act any different around catnip.  Do you think something is wrong with him, besides being a cat.   Hmmph, I believe we mentioned in that article that liking catnip was passed on from a mother cat, or sometimes if catnip is not native to the area Wilbur lived he won't care for it.  Wilbur is just fine and a lovely guy who has been forced to live with two Siberian Huskies.  'Nuff said.

Gail in Aberdeen wrote a serious question to me.  She asks what is the feline perspective on how best  to cope with a newly dogless household.  Ah, Gail, we all knew and loved Hamish (even me!) and we realize you must be lonely for a pet.  We cats don't concern ourselves with how long is a correct time to wait before getting another pet.  Your late Hamish would encourage you to get another dog rather than be lonely for him.
Thats what I am guessing anyway.  Have you ever thought of how very nice a couple of kittens would be? Clean, playful, and pleasant little creatures.  But if you insist on a dog, start looking and when you find the right one, you will know.  Good luck!

Max of South Africa wrote: after you answered me last week about the howling cats, I must tell you we have NO Animal Control Bureau here.  The kitties run around wild at night, thats the norm here.  Should I appoint myself Animal Control Officer . . .will the kitties like me?    No, Max, its no job for one dog, believe me.  Your City Fathers of Jo'berg, need to get lots of complaints from people, and maybe then there will be some political action.  If this continues to go on, you will be overrun with cats of all sizes, and they can start to carry disease.  Not a pretty picture!  Get your Mom and neighbors to howl to the politicians with the purse strings.  Good luck, Max, and hope you are feeling well today!

One answer questions:

Remington asks Do you Have a column in the New Yorker yet?    NO

Stumpy asks if I am familiar with Simon's cat and do I like him?      YES

Khyra the Sibe asks I would expekht sleeping in fur woo means       NO
staying asleep fur more than a day?

Eric asks How much Dognip would Mango need?                           LOTS

Dennis the Vizsla asks would you ask Bobcat Goldthwait to host        NO
my sunday awards and meem show?

All for today, send questions via comments and get them here by next Tuesday!

Meow, meow,

Ali Zophia

16 comments:

Unknown said...

Loved your advice as usual. Lots of BOL moments. I particularly liked what you told Mayzie, and the dognip for Mango and... you get my point. Great post
Twinkie

Bobby said...

You always give good advice, you are so wise.

Martha said...

Ali Z, you are wise beyond words!
Our mum would love another kitty cat and we reckon we would like one too although it would have to be a little kitten!
We think a big grown up cat would be too hard!
She says one day, when she has retired, it will be on her list!
We love your posts!
love
Martha & Bailey xxx

Anonymous said...

I had no idea there was a starving dog hotline. Thank you so much Ali Z. I'm going to go call right now... I hope I can muster up enough strength to push the buttons on the phone:(

The Adventures of the LLB Gang said...

As usual Ali Z...your advice is priceless!!

Smileys!
Dory

Teddy Westlife said...

I'm with Wilbur. Catnip doesn't do much for me either.

Sagira said...

Lots of good advice there!

Steve, Kat, & Wilbur said...

While Wilbur totally agrees with you, Steve and Kat are offended. :-)

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

There is absolutely nothing 'normal' about LB -

Steve and Kat really need to have a talk with their pawrents -

I mean, even their mom is afraid of the furry monster -

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra & Khousin Merdie

Dexter said...

Dexter here! What is all the fuss about eating rocks? They are very satisfying and they come out all shiny. I even think that they could be mounted into a nice necklace for momma after they have been polished by my innards. What do you think?

Kisses,
Dexter

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh, Ali Z...thanks you so much for your Most Great advices. I will try very, very, very hard to remember what you said. But I just LUVS Abby so much that it's hard to control myself. But I will try. Cross my heart!

Wiggles & Wags,
Mayzie

KB said...

Ali Z: How did you learn so much about everything? Has anyone ever stumped you with a question? Maybe I should send my dogs to the same school that you went to!

Kate said...

All Hail Queen Ali Zophia, masterful source of advice and neverending knowledge...

I bow at your paws...

Great advice!! How would everykitty and pupper survive without you?

Koda MD

Maxmom said...

Hello there dear Ali-Z

Mom says she's giggling because...all her neighbours are the very kitty owners whose cats I am worried about! I think I'll catch them...makes more sense...to this MAXDOG! (Oh, I will return them home too!)

My question this week: What does the sunshine, "Letsatsi" do for you, dear Ali-Z? Do you lie in it too, like me?

Remember..I love you, Ali-Z...I'll tell my neighbours kitties that I'm a kitty-dog...maybe then they'll listen.

Lotsalicks
MAXDOG IN SOUTH AFRICA

The 'splorin' Wolfies said...

oh Ali-z--what does one say about all that!

The Oceanside Animals said...

hello ali z its dennis the vizsla dog hay hmmmm ok i unnerstand yoo do not want to impose on yore frend bobcat goldthwait in that kayse can yoo giv me his fone number and i wil call him and ask him to host the sunday awards and meem show myself??? thanks ok bye